You totally thought about that too, didn’t you?
I woke up to the sound of water hitting a surface and I instantly turned my head to see an empty bed next to me. I recognised it as a shower noise and thought that Nathan should be the one using it. My thoughts seemed to be correct as I heard his unbelievably amazing voice singing Stevie Wonder’s tune in the shower. I let myself to lie in bed for a few more minutes and just enjoy the sound of his voice which made me melt inside. I promised myself to ask him to sing for me some time in the future. I just loved his voice so much.
As I was still thinking about it with my eyes closed, I realised the singing was now gone and soon I felt warm fingers running on my cheek. I smiled there and heard Nathan giggling.
“Good morning, Jules.” He kissed me on the forehead and I opened my eyes to see him sitting on the edge of the bed and leaning to me, wearing only a towel.
“Mhm…” I whined there as I wasn’t feeling like waking up just yet and rolled to the other side of the bed away from him and his wet body.
“Fine, sleep as long as you want. I just thought we could walk to have breakfast…” He said and I opened my eyes once again. Wider this time.
“Breakfast?” I asked sitting up and turning my head to face his smile as he probably knew I was hungry most of the time.
“Yeah. I though just a simple breakfast out could distract you from everything. Let’s just have fun. You and me. Nothing else.” He said and I nodded. I needed that a lot right now.
I probably looked like a mess, because I was definitely feeling as one and I expected to see that from Nathan’s look, but he never gave me a chance to do that, as his look was a bit different that I thought it would be.
“But I have to get home for some clothes at least.” I said. I mean, all I had was a pair of jeans from last night and I couldn’t go wearing the same. What would neighbors think?
“Just get to the shower and I’ll figure something out.” He shrugged and I nodded my head when he stood and walked out of the room. I jumped out of bed and went to the bathroom to take a quick shower.
I was putting my watch on when Jules walked downstairs. We managed to find some of Kelsey’s clothes that she was keeping in the house for those extra cases when she stayed at Tom’s room. I hoped she wouldn’t mind and I had to admit that a pair of leggings and a pink loose sweater looked even better on my girl than it did on Hardwick. She had put her hair in a messy bun. A smile appeared on her face when she noticed me. We walked outside hand in hand and since it was pretty early nobody really cared that it was me with her just taking a walk. It was nice to just go out without really worrying about getting captured by a sneaky photographer.
We laughed the whole way till we decided to walk into a first place we noticed to get coffee and breakfast. We took a table outside and just sat there talking and laughing from each other while drinking our coffee and feeding each other with rolls and toasts in a really weird, but cute way.
“Well, I’m full.” She said leaning back in her chair and laughing.
“Come on, just try this one!” I told her waving a croissant full of caramel. She rolled her eyes and took a bite. I put the rest back on the napkin. “Yeah, me too!” I agreed with her and she laughed from my slow answer. Since I haven’t had serious breakfast in a while, I really didn’t need a lot to make myself feel like I’m full. “Should we go?” I asked her, but she didn’t get a chance to reply as a woman in her mid-thirties approached our table with a smile covering her face.
“I hope I’m not disturbing or anything.” She said carefully. She was holding a baby who looked like he was only a few months old. “I’m Megan.” She introduced herself.
“Hello! I’m Nathan. This is Jules.” I pointed to my girl. “How can we help you?” I asked trying to be polite. She was wearing a jacket and I noticed that it had a huge stain on it.
“Um. We kind of had a bit of an accident. I spilled my drink and I really need to get it cleaned. I was wondering if you could look after my baby, so I could get to the bathroom.” She asked us politely and before I could say anything, Jules stood up with a slight grin on her face.
“Of course. No problem.” She took the baby in her hands. “Aww… What’s his name?” She asked.
“Mathew. Thank you. I’ll be back in a second.” She assured us and walked away to the bathroom.
I watched as Jules slowly sat down looking at the baby in her hands and not being able to move her eyes from him. I had to admit, he was adorable. Deep blue eyes and pink cheeks. As he looked at her he put his little hand in the air and waved with it in excitement. Mathew gave Jules a huge smile and she responded the same.
“Is little Mathew tired? No? Of course he’s not. He’s a big boy now.” Jules was talking to the baby like adults usually talk to their children, but she seemed different from my point of view. You know, when people usually make weird voices or goofy faces while talking to children? Well, she didn’t use any of that and still made the kid giggle.
I looked at her smiling and couldn’t help, but think that she might be a wonderful mother one day.
She soon lifted her eyes to face mine’s and I saw how happy she seemed at that moment. How that one kid had completely changed her mood.
“Do you want to hold it?” She asked me and before I could realise what I was doing I nodded my head, moving my chair next to hers.
“Just hold the head and everything will be alright.” She carefully gave me Mathew and when he was in my arms I could see even better why Jules seemed to be so crazy about that kid. His ocean-colored eyes now were staring at me like he was thinking who the hell was I and he looked shy and careful before he turned his eyes to see Jules’ face once again. She had put her head on my shoulder and now was smiling widely to him.
When Mathew turned his head towards me again I giggled.
“I hear you, mate. I can’t take my eyes of her most of the time either. She’s fit.” I bit my lip as the baby was listening to every word that came out of my mouth and when I laughed, he smiled at me.
I didn’t realise it for a second, but I felt warm lips on my cheek just for a bit and raised my eyebrows from amazement. I was honestly not expecting that.
“He’s going to break girls’ hearts when he grows up.” Juliet said with a sad tone in her voice.
“I completely agree with you.” I nodded, turning my head to see Jules, who caught my look and only then gave me a simple smile.
I realised she was thinking about the past when she mentioned broken hearts, but I didn’t have the courage to bring it up and ask her, so I just leaned and kissed her forehead giving her a reason to smile for at least few more seconds. I’d do anything to make her smile.
The woman, Megan, came back really soon afterwards. She seemed to managed to get the stain out and now was reaching her hands for the baby.
“Was everything alright? Did he cry?” She asked sounding worried like every other mother.
“No, he was just perfect.” I said, standing up and giving the baby away. My hands seemed empty as I did that. It looked like I was missing something and I didn’t have where to put my hands, so I awkwardly threw them in my pockets.
“Thank you so much for helping me.” She said to both of us and after saying goodbye she walked away. I turned around to see Jules who was staring at me in a really weird way and I didn’t like it.
“What?” I asked her as I pulled my wallet out just so I’d have any kind of activity for my hands.
“Was this the first time you actually held a baby?” She asked and I froze. Was it really that obvious?
“Maybe.” I shrugged putting money on the table to pay for our breakfast.
“But you were a natural.” She said as she reached out for my hand and stood up.
“That? I was barely breathing.” I admitted as we walked out.
“He liked you.” She was still trying to convince me I wasn’t as bad as I thought about myself.
“He liked you too.” I reported back and she giggled.
“That’s different. I was always good with children. I’ve picked up a few tricks. You weren’t even trying and the kid seemed happy. Your children will be very proud and happy to call you dad.” She giggled and I smiled before saying anything else. This made me think.
“I’ve never thought about kids, actually.” I confessed as we were on our way home. “You know, spending your time with four most immature guys ever doesn’t make you think about future, family and all that.”
“You’re young. There’s no reason to be thinking about that just now. We both are too young for that.” She nodded her head and I smirked.
“We?” I repeated her. “What do you mean ‘we’?”
She blushed and I stopped walking right there making her turn to me.
“Well, you know… I was just thinking… That maybe someday you and me… Our children.” She said carefully and I giggled pulling her into a hug as I could tell she was feeling really uncomfortable by just talking about it.
“You totally thought about that too, didn’t you?” I poked her arm playfully.
“No, I just… Wait. Too? Did you mean..?” She raised her eyebrow at me and I bit my lip. I really didn’t want to show what I was thinking before, but she caught me, so I might as well tell the truth.
“Yeah, I mean… I kind of had some thoughts.” I finally admitted letting her go from my arms.
“Isn’t it weird?” She asked with her tongue bit by her perfect teeth.
“What do you mean?” I had to ask. In no way this seemed weird to me. Well, maybe just a little.
“Isn’t it just a bit too soon to be talking about kids?” She asked and giggled. I smiled for a second.
“Have you met you?” I smirked at her. “If you had met you then you would definitely be talking about having kids with you.” I poked her nose pulling her into another hug with my arms around her shoulders.
“Oh… You!..” She sighed, kissed my cheek and we both laughed.
“Are you ready to go home?” I asked her when we both pulled apart.
“Yeah. Mind dropping my clothes at my place later tonight?” She said when we started walking again.
“Sure. Will I be able to stay or do you want to hang out tonight?” I had some ideas where we should go this evening, but her answer was completely different from what I had in mind.
“Stay. I need someone in the house I could talk to.” She said not in the happiest tone also avoiding my look.
“If you don’t feel like going home all you need to do is say. There will always be room in our place and I’m sure he’ll understand.” I told her, but she shook her head knowing I meant her dad.
“I can’t do that. I mean… I kind of told him about the possibility of moving out and if I decide to stay with you another night he’ll freak out.” She explained when we walked down the street. “School’s about to start and I want to keep my life as normal as possible for that.”
No way was her life normal. The whole mother situation was getting slowly out of control. And then there was me. If we had to pick the most abnormal thing in her life, I’d go as number one on that list. I almost broke her heart twice already and made her go through some hard shit that I’d never imagine anyone going through.
I kept myself quiet for a while still thinking. To be fair, I haven’t thought about her going to school. Summer’s almost over and when she starts school again, I won’t be able to see her that much as she’ll be busy at least every half of the day and then I’ll probably won’t have time for her as we were planning to be working on our new album for weeks. Day after day in the studio sounds horrible when I know my girlfriend won’t be there to keep me company or give me a cheeky smile every time I turn my head to see her.
“You’re alright?” Jules asked me after a while.
“Yeah. Just thinking about tonight.” I gave her a smile. My first lie to her. I didn’t sound really sure, so just turned my head to the road and we walked the street chatting and giggling, not even trying to give a damn about the rest of the world.
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